How do you know when you made the right decision? What do you consider when you have to make a tough decision? What does making the right decision mean? Is there such thing as a right decision? What if you made the wrong decision? When do you know you made the right decision?
Every aspect of our lives is based on decisions. Take breakfast for example. You decided what to eat for breakfast today. If you didn't have breakfast, maybe you were running late for work or school and decided you didn't have time. Maybe you skipped breakfast to reduce your caloric intake. Maybe you just felt lazy and didn't want to make yourself breakfast. Regardless of whatever happened this morning, you made numerous decisions regarding breakfast.
We are constantly making decisions every day. Whether its consciously or subconsciously, decisions dictate how we live our lives. While some decisions are more significant than what to eat for breakfast, even the small decisions can have a great impact on our lives. Humans are creatures of habit, and the decisions we make have a strong impact on our habits.
As I've explained in previous posts, I'm a very curious person. I'm always in search of understanding the world and myself. Admittedly, I have an unhealthy obsession of trying to find 'the right answer.' I have a fear of making the wrong decision that will negatively impact me. I tend to yearn for an answer that will solve my problem, which doesn't actually lead to any solution.
Maybe you can relate to me to some degree. Perhaps you are able to figure out a solution to your problems much quicker than myself — to which I applaud you.
Limbo
Recent events in life had left me feeling uncertain. The best way to describe this would be that I felt as if I could not make a correct decision. While I am not suggesting I was unhappy, this indecisiveness prevented me from moving forward with my life.
Simply put, I was in limbo.
Without getting into all the details, it's not a good place to be. It leads to constantly doubting yourself, not trusting your feelings, overthinking, and simply being lost. While finding a solution felt impossible, I would pretend that it was a non-issue. Distracting myself from the issue was merely a temporary solution. Not thinking about it allowed me to be happier, but whenever this issue came to mind, I'd have that feeling of being in limbo. I was unable to find the answer I was looking for. However, I was setting myself up for failure.
Making the right decision
My shortcomings were not due to my inability to find the right answer, but that I believed there was one to find.
With the help of outside perspectives, I realized that there was no right answer to my issue. I was looking for a way that the world would give me an answer, but it was never going to happen. Some problems in our lives don't have a correct answer to them. Many situations we find ourselves in are not based on right and wrong outcomes. Who can predict what the outcome will be for any decision we make? What makes life so difficult is it's unpredictability and lack of instruction manual. We live in a labyrinth that has no way out.
But that's also the beauty of life.
We all have the power to make decisions that we think will be best for ourselves. While there isn't any correct answer to find or decision to make, we are able to measure if the outcome was good. Self-reflection enables us to determine if we are happy and fulfilled with whatever outcome is presented. Being capable of freely making decisions is a gift that we all have to live our lives the way we want to.
Not having a correct answer to find allows us to live according to our own terms. Again, there is no blueprint to how you should navigate your life and decisions. This necessarily means no one has the ability to tell you that you are doing something wrong. The only person that can be the judge of your decisions is yourself.
Considering others
I need to make myself very clear on this point. While no one else can judge your decisions, it is within their right to be affected by them. Your decisions do have an impact on those around you, especially if they are involved with the situation. For example, you are free to cheat on your partner, but you have to accept that you are potentially burning a bridge with them. While this example is drastic, the principle applies to every situation.
Again, the onus is on yourself to consider this in your decision making process. If how someone else feels towards your decision will have an impact on how you view the outcome, you have to take it into consideration. If it is relevant to your outcome, you must consider how others will feel. If you care about how someone else may feel, have an honest discussion with them about it to get an understanding of how they would react.
"It's about asking the right questions, not finding the right answers." — Geoffrey Whitman
This quote that I have shared was said to me by my high school philosophy teacher. Unfortunately, it is something that I lost sight of when dealing with my recent issue.
You will never be able to find the correct answer to your problem. It doesn't exist. What you have to find is an understanding of the problem itself. More importantly, you have to find an understanding of yourself. Asking yourself the right questions will enable you to grasp an understanding of what you want the outcome to be. What will make you happy? If you do x, will you be regret not doing y? Is the decision you are making better for you long-term? These are the kinds of questions that will help shape your understanding of what you want your outcome to look like. The correct answer to your problem is the one that you will be happiest and most confident in.
Life is not filled with right and wrong decisions, but simply different pathways that will lead us to where we are going. No matter the path you choose, ensure that it is leading to your happiness.
— Rob
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